Another reason I haven't posted an update is because I was still thinking through all of my options. I have a white board in my house for times such as these, so I charted out my options. Here they are:
As you can see by the big blue checkmarks, I've decided to take part in the clinical trial at MD Anderson. My liver levels were low enough on Thursday to be eligible for the trial, but they have to stay down until April 15. I will also have to pass other screeners that day. If all goes well with the screeners, I will have another biopsy done April 16, and on April 17, I will finally start treatment.
If I don't pass the screeners, I will start chemotherapy in Dallas immediately at either Baylor or UTSW.
I have felt the love in every visit, phone call, message, blog comment, handwritten note, and perfect little gift sent my way. While you are all sending out so much healing energy on my behalf, I am sending nothing but pure love and gratitude back to all of you. Cancer is not good, but the awareness of love and clarity and goodness that it creates is pretty amazing.
5 comments:
Of course you have a white board!!! By chance, are there some sticky notes around your home helping you learn a new language? So happy you have some clarity and plan of action. Love you and so proud(but not at all surprised) of your strength and amazing attitude!
Love your white board, love you, and praying for you frequently! I’m glad you’ve made a decision. I’m praying for it to go smoothly and work like a beast that devours Big Bertha or Tuma Thurman or whatever you named it.💪🏼
jbahlinger I am Joshua Dodds mom......reading your blog has raced me back to my time at MDA over twenty years ago now fighting breast cancer. I have wonderful stories of connections I made at MDA. I was a single mom in my early forties and had three kids. My prognosis was not as difficult as yours but cancer is never easy. I loved reading your sense of cancer giving you permission to really live life with no illusions. It was that way for me too. I am cheering you on. Cancer renewed my life as a seeker. You can count on prayers and all the healing vibs I know how to send.
Hoping you kick the crap out of those screener tests!!!
You prayed for the love...❤️❤️❤️❤️
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